You want a relationship? Follow the unwritten rules.

Every couple of weeks or so my next door neighbor offers to buy me dinner.  He likes a particular waitress at a certain Mexican restaurant.  Well!  I like Mexican food and especially if someone else is paying.  Listen I am in my late forties and he is in his early fifties and the waitress is in her late twenties.  I am an only child and have always been used to doing things by myself and never really had any problem  with initiating relationships, whether for business or pleasure.

The unwritten rule when a man meets a lady, and they seem to like each other they should exchange information and attempt  to call her with in  two or three days and talk and perhaps make arrangements to meet again.  It is not wrong for the woman to expect to be courted.  It is silly for the man to think that  he is to wait for the woman to make the first move.  

I do not understand what part of my friends brain is stuck.  He is from South America (Ecuador) and the men from this part of the world are considered to be world-class charmers / lovers.  Something is missing with him.  

I am the kind of person, that when I want something or someone, I will do what I have to win the person or thing.  I might be wrong but my free Mexican dinner is delicious.  I offer advice as a friend  and someone who has had more than his fair share of rejections.  Looking at my dinner from another point of view, the more my friend likes the waitress and the longer she does not call him the more dinners I will not have to pay for, or until I get tired of eating Mexican.

There has to be a spark of light to be seen from both sides as a sign that the  relation is going to go further.  Neither the man or the woman should think that they are better than the other.  Being cool and calm is the key to victory.  If either party exhibits signs of hunger or desperation than things become spooked and things fall  apart.

When you are out and are looking to meet someone, please be relaxed and do not be expecting of anything, this will in turn work in your favor and you might even find a person  that is interested.

Gobble-Gobble.....Time for Turkey

Thanksgiving an annual American holiday representing the pilgrims being saved with the discovery of food.  This year the "boss" went shopping and she was given a turkey for Thanksgiving.  I am not a big fan of any type of poultry  but now that we have it it must be cooked.  Well, you know what I have decided that I am going to cook it outside on the rotisserie.

The turkey is native to the Americas and when the Pilgrims landed, were running wild throughout the land.

I am going to bend and eat turkey this year, being that I am going to cook it.  It is a thirteen pound bird and it should take about four hours of turning at 350 degrees fahrenheit.  I have discussed the turkey with several chef friends of mine and they have suggested that the bird be in a brine solution for 24 hours prior to it being cooked.

Menopause......can drive everybody nuts.

Life goes through stages from the time we are born.  Men and and women have very few differences but the most evident and disruptive is menopause.  This is a stage in a woman's life, in that her hormones interfere with her feelings and her life goes haywire and in turn one minute she is hot and the next she is cold.  On the other hand a woman's mind could answer "yes" and the next it could be "no".

One minute she is happy-go-lucky and the next she is the devil in a dress.  A pretty flower that when picked you get a hand full of thorns.  

The best thing to do, when a woman is at any stage of menopause, is to stay away or leave her alone for she knows not what she is doing or saying.  A couple could be having a peaceful conversation one moment and the next she is either crying or yelling.

Be diplomatic....Do  not try to find the logic because there is none.  A woman  during menopause think that there is nothing wrong with them and that everything is normal and that everybody else is in the wrong....

TOTAL DISTORTION!!!

What goes around comes around...

We have become a world of tattletales and no one minds their own business anymore.  If you are going to take it upon yourself to correct every wrong there is, you had better be squeaky clean other wise things will backfire you will be in a mess that is started by you.
Just because you are in a manage position, does not mean you know what is going on.  If you want to look good to the boss, just wear a clean suit and do your job.  If you try to mop up, look at yourself first.  At on of the places I work there was a supervisor that thought he should be "Mr. Clean-up".  Well!  Mr Clean-up was not what he wanted everyone else to be.  He was always looking to get employees on any technicality.  Don't let the door hit you where the sun does not shine.  You cannot mop the floor with a dirty mop.  The bully manager got fired for doing the nasty with a female coworker in a store room, while his wife was home pregnant.  Sound like his health insurance is no more.   What will he tell his wife?  The baby need to be born but I had needs that got me fired.  "Hit the road Jack and don't come back no more"!

Fight for your rights!!!

The world of today is overpopulated and over produced.  Everyone is competing for the limited number of spaces, whether they be for work or school or housing.  With every new generation coming of age two or three older generations are displaced.  The problem is that they are left with out a spot way before it is time for them to change.  

People go to school and university.  Later they land a job,(for some it is a dream job) and devote their time and energy all the way.  Due the maximization of resources in business, when there is over production, the line stops and people suffer.  Layoff's buyouts and firings are a form of correcting the economy but with these actions being implemented people suffer.  In an economy that is in its infancy, planning is much simpler and mistakes are absorbed much easier.  In an economy that is very intertwined with economies any move be it larger or small needs more thought.  

In the case where people become displaced negotiations for their rights become more delicate and if those being on the loosing end should stand their ground, otherwise, they will be left without a venerable compensation.
Every moment of every day is a negotiation and many times a struggle for a person to achieve what they want.  Whether we are in a capitalist system or a communist system people need to be busy producing.  Unfortunately the comes a point in both system that there is over production and people need to be redirected.  The bad thing about retraining people is that many times it happens at in opportune times.

Even though we live in a free society, 

ironically nothing comes free or easy.  

Freud and his theory on the relationship between a mother and her son...

The relationship between a mother and here son(s) is one of great scrutiny, from the beginning of time.  Mother are excited to give birth to their babies, especially if the new borns are boys.  As the babies grow up the relationship between mother and son is extremely special.  Eventually, the boys become adolescents and young men and finally adult mature males.

As grew older my mom would say, do not think that I can't scold you even if you are big.  I am your mother and I could as I please.

Guacamole

The avocado one very few if any that contains "fat".  The fat that is in the the avocado is of the healthy variety.  The avocado has long been neglected in our cuisine.  As we age our body needs fat for lubrication and as an avenue for nutrients to be stored and transported throughout all of it.  

There is a difference between good fat and bad fat.  Avocado contains good fat as it can be broken down by our bodies much easier than animal fat.   Guacamole is a type of spread or dip made from avocado mix with onions,  tomatoes,  peppers and salt, pepper, cilantro and lime juice.  This is now a delicious substitute for mayonnaise or ketchup.  Avocados are quite delicious and very nutritious and so should be included in our dietary plan.

Let it out!!!

With all the things that are happening in society today, every one's feelings get to be compressed and many people become couped up in themselves.   And one day POOF!  I am the kind of person that has realized the holding your feelings and thoughts inside can cause other more severe problems to their health.  High blood pressure, diabetes, obesity, stroke and depression can occur from holding all your thought inside.

Humans are in this life for an average of 70-80 years of age.  Without stress those years could have wonderful experiences.  The more our thoughts are suppressed the shorter these years will seem. Life without stress always is more pleasurable.  Being angry or sad and not talking your thoughts out, in the long run turn out to be harmful to you and sometimes other around.

Mood change...

Honey, how do you think I look?

Everyday we wake up there is something on our mind.  Some days we are happy and others we are grumpy.  Either way if we are not healthy it does not matter.  Women tend to fluctuate more with their moods more than men.  In order to satisfy others first we must take care of ourselves.  Every single person in this world has problems, some more than others.  What really should matter is health because without it other things have no meaning.

Make a Decisions Already....

Life is full of decisions and options.  What to do and what to say.  As humans we have a limited timeline where we can make effective decision and be able to enjoy the results.  When my parents were young, my father was into trying different businesses in order to make a better life for himself and his family.  My mother on the other hand was comfortable with living in one house with her husband and her son.  My mother loved children and wanted many.  My father loved children as well but loved and still loves himself more was satisfied with just having the one son.

 

When I got married and had my three sons, my mother was very happy and eager to help in the raising of my boys.  My father was also excited the he became a grandfather and would tell my mother that they should have had more children.  This comment would annoy mom and she would answer him, "You did not want them when I had them when we were young and now it is too late.""Just enjoy your grand children".
Her point was that everything in life has a time.  People should do thing in their time.  Doing things in other periods will not have the same results.  Being a parent is not for very late in life.  Just because you can physically have a baby at sixty three, does not guarantee that you will around to see the child grow up.  Most of the fun in having a child is to see it grow up.  If you are older and a baby come in your life, it is a blessing but you as a parent might not be around to see all the important things that will happen in it's life.  Who would want to push a baby carriage when they are ready for the wheelchair themselves?  
Not me!

Brothers argue...They say it is normal?

I am an only child and not used to arguing for every little thing in life.  Every now and then my sons have differences.  When  the arguments get out of hand they really take it far out of bounds.   I, as a person do not care for screaming and yelling and not to mention the use of physical harm to convey my message(S).  I have no brothers and/ or sisters to know that siblings have differences and sometimes they can get out of hand.

On occasion, my sons will engage in a conversation that will lead to silliness and even further to disaster.  Children need nurturing  even when they  get out of themselves.  My oldest son is seventeen and studying to take his road test for his driver's license.  Every time we as a family have some place to go, Peter, is a the steering wheel of our family car.  My second son Elias, who happens to be his junior by twenty-two months sits in the backs and always mumbles things that would annoy the driver.  

When Peter is concentrating on driving and everything surrounding him and the vehicle he is controlling, there is no reason for silly comments from the peanut gallery, that happens to be his brother.  As time passes I also discover that there is absolutely no reason for me as a parent to get in between there situation.  On  the other hand, I happen to be a passenger in the vehicle with every one and if I do not speak up the argument will escalate and a further disaster might ensue.
The line dividing the duties of a parent and those of a judge is very fine and delicate.   It is important to stay neutral but it is also necessary to keep my sanity.

Do not buy if you can not afford all the rest....

A friend of mine goes on a date.  It was nothing out of the ordinary except that she is a tall woman with long blond hair and and slender physique, hugely pretty.  She is asked out by this gentleman and they go to a very high end eating establishment.  Before the go in, he tells my friend that he is not  too hungry and that they should share an appetizer.  Hey!  this is how it is, if you can not afford it then you should not be going here.  If you want to be with someone that will elevate your stature, then this want is going to cost you and you should not be thinking about the "how much".  Instead you should be saying, "I am a lucky dog....uh-huh!"

When you close your eyes it all looks and feels the same.  If you want to keep your eyes open than my friend open your wallet and do not be afraid to spend.
We must never forget this great universal saying,  "money talks and bull-shit walks".
You drive a late luxury vehicle and you are dressed to the nine's.  You need to park and instead of pulling into a lot near the venue you have to be, you circle around looking for a cheap or free spot.  The dealer did not tell his customer that when they make a luxury purchase they should get into this mentality.  Luxury items need special pampering and better than usual maintenance.  Cheapskates should be barred from owning or even frequenting in places classified as luxury of exquisite quality.  Every single day I see vehicles being towed because they parked in the wrong spot not to pay for parking.

In the same way a person gets a pet but they do not realize that the pet needs care, love, food water and a bath and cleaning up after.  Everything in life has costs, both fixed and variable.   
Remember if you cannot  afford the upkeep then by the cheaper model.

Warm weather satisfaction

When I take trips to places with warmer climates my body feels much better than when I am in the cold damp places. Warm weather is better all around. A person eats less, dresses lighter and drinks more in the warm weather.

When it is to hot people request air-conditioning and when it is too cold, with the same vigor, request that the heat be turned up.  For the past few years I have developed sciatica and this during cold damp weather  makes me feel "loopy" and tired.

Pickle relish......the all around condiment.

Pickle relish is a condiment that can be used with almost all foods.
Chop up in to small chunk the following:

half sour pickles

• two kosher dill pickles 
• two sour pickles
• one jalapeño pepper
• one red cherry pepper
• one red sweet pepper
• four cloves of garlic
• two table spoons honey
• two tablespoons dijon mustard
• two tablespoons olive oil



chopped pickles



jars of my relis

• two tablespoons red wine vinegar 

 Combine all the ingredients in a pot and simmer to a rapid boil the turn heat off and put into jars and store.  Enjoy with you favorite food as a condiment.

Complicated....

When you work for a big corporation, there many people around you and all of them have characters that are simple easygoing. Others have complicated and overly sensitive personalities.  You are at your desk doing the job you were hired for but the are are employees above and below you.  The institution you work for has instituted certain policies and certain rules.  Each and every employee is to follow and should not be exempt from said rules if it is to thrive in the long run.  

Rules are rules!  They exist so that there is an order and that every thing and every person does not collide with each other.   In a "free market economy", maximum out can be and is allowed ass long as it is done within the realms of the law and the outline set out by the company.  

Everywhere you go some one's feelings are hurt or their plans are thrown off course.  There is a reason for rules and outlines and policies and plans.  The reason is for everyone and everything to coexist without friction.  What strikes me as being funny is that those people that make the rules and policies have the distinct notion that they are exempt  from them.  Examples of this are found in every sector of society.

We example of "do as I say not as I do" in religion (priests involved in cases of abuse both sexual and financial).  In civil service some one needs something done and offers or accepts a bribe for special treatment.  In hospitals, certain executive elect special treatment because they are in a position of leadership.  If their shenanigans  are intercepted and by an unknowing lower manager, just following policy the axe falls.  This incorrect rules are and should be for everyone and no one should be scorned or prosecuted for following the rules.  The whole world is in a mess because certain people follow the laws and other think they should be exempt.

I SAY NO! NO! NO! NO!

If its good for the Goose it is good for the gander!

Companion....

A companion is some that is with another person.  Men and women are looking for companions every second of life.  People like to be on their own but they also crave to be with others for interaction.  There have been many songs written about everybody needing somebody, either to love or be with .  In my life experience I often come to the conclusion that people whether they are male or female we all have baggage that we carry from one relationship to the other.

The key is to find the companion that is the least headache to be with.  We are all headaches, some more the others.  Whenever I am behind the bar people come and go.  There has yet to be a time where a person that walks in with someone is happy with who they are with.  Life is simple, people with their quirks make it complicated.  

The too-too good and the too-too bad, do not always last too-too long.  A man and a woman  walk in to my bar initially they are all over each other and all of a sudden they are at each other with accusations.  Drinks are spilling and slaps are flying.  Life is too short for drama.  Close the lights it is all the same.  With society advancing more and more life is supposed to be simpler but is not.  We are able cross all barriers withe use of the internet and are demands become greater for essentially the same results.  Human needs are basic and should stay as such. Food, drink, clothing, housing, entertainment, transportation and sexual stimulation.  With in these boundaries everything is relevant  and available. 

Baked potatoes............Delicious and Nutritious.

I like variety in every part of my life.  This may seem hypocritical but I am also not in favor of surprises.  Last Sunday I went shopping.  Among the many items I purchased, there was a bag of Idaho  baking potatoes.  It has been a long time since I have russets so big.

These giant potatoes that I have contain a huge amount of potassium, about a quarter of what is required by the human body to run efficiently.  The potato itself has almost no fat.  When we choose to put butter, margarine, or sour cream on the potato then it is loaded with extra fat and calories.   The potato itself with a little salt and pepper is a perfect all-around-food at any time.  This past week I have been having the giant potatoes for breakfast.  When I eat one potato at about 5 am I feel full until about 11:30 am.  It actually holds my cravings for a long while.   With the proper seasoning the Idaho potato is hearty enough to keep me from being hungry soon.

If I decide the potato could  be my main dish or the side.   The potato as a entree could be loaded with bacon, mushrooms,  scallions, and even cheddar cheese.  Breakfast, lunch or dinner the Idaho potato is a power food and is to be enjoyed as such.  It is yummy on its own or serve with a steak or burger or even seafood.  Filling nutritious and delicious the giant potato is perfect.

When I wake up in the morning or whenever I am in the mood for a baked potato I rinse the potato to be eaten and salt the outside and place in the microwave oven for about 12 to 15 minutes on high, until it is squeezable.  Then I cut the potato in half the long way and drop my desired toppings over the two halves.  The potato comes out of the microwave oven steaming hot and the different flavors are intermingled wonderfully in the steam.

Yummy for your tummy!!!

Who wears the pants?

In today's time who wears the pants in the family does not really matter, as long as the decisions made are for the greater good.  It is of no use to be a leader that is hated and constantly loosing ground.  Wearing the pants does not make a person any smarter or powerful.  With the advent of technology a person does not have to be dress at all to make any sort of decisions.
There are many head of households that choose not to wear trousers but this fact does not make them any less of a man.  Many great warriors of the world wore skirts or kilts or togas, this practice did not detract from their manhood or ability to lead successfully.  
The other day a friend of mine throw a jab in by saying, "we know who wears the pants in your family".  To me it does not matter who is on top.  What does matter is the out come and how much I looking to benefit.  Life is short as it stands and if I can enjoy more of it without sweating or thinking, then I am all for the idea of not wearing the "pants".  If I can lead a life of leisure and someone else is to hit the pavement  for a living then "by all means"no pants for me.  
Women are complaining constantly that they are getting the shorter end of the stick.  What they really do not understand is that they actually have more power.  In an argument with three people and one happens to be a woman.  The lady calls the police and when the arrive, the two men are cuffed as the woman makes accusations.  The moral of the story if a lady calls the police about a man, the man is in more trouble than the woman. 

It does not matter who wears the pants.  

What does matter is who gets arrested.

Spanking.....

When a baby is first born, the doctor spanks it on it on the rear so that it can start crying and clear its lungs from any embryonic fluids that are lodged in there from gestation.  Growing up a person gets used to spanking, as a form of clearing up or snapping out of a trancelike state they may be in.  In other situations people grow to like being slapped on the rear as a form of empowerment.  During the course of lovemaking, in and around the excitement  there is an exchange of role-play and spanking.  This raises the libido as well as the energy for all parties involved.

Role-play is exciting and an excellent way to get the blood flowing.  As long as all the people involved are interested in having fun than no one will be hurt.  When a couple is together, there is a need for variety in order to be a sustainable interest by all the people.  The experts say that variety is the spice of life.  How many times can you have the same meal before you get bored?    Occasionally there is a need for change.  In my tenure as a bartender the number of time I have been asked to partake in the adventures of visiting couples and singles is mind boggling.  People need attention and adventure and I need a drink.  If everyone acts with tact and respect, a good loud whack in the tush will bring euphoria to all those involved.

People have so many things going on in their lives, that once in a while a good whack could help them "snap out of it".  Everyday you wake up to a routine and every night you come home to the same thing.  Eggs, tunafish salad,mashed potatoes.  All of a sudden you discover salad nicoise and everything is in the light.  A dish from southern France that consists of potatoes, hard boiled eggs, olive, tuna, tomatoes, olives, in dijon vinegarette dressing.  If eaten separately each ingredient is bland and ordinary but when mixed together in a salad with a tangy dressing they become wow.

The term variety is the spice of life is quite fitting for this.  A person could have the same result every single day.  The excitement is how the results are derived.  Enjoy your life because everything is uncertain.....

Spank....Spank.....Spank......

Have fun!!!

Everyone is expendable....

As life goes forward I look at the past and say it was better during the time of my parents. We have all the modern conveniences of life to allow us plenty of free time. When a person has empty time and no plan as what to do with it, all that happens is nothing. In the grand plan for profit and maximization of resources for every position there are lines of people waiting to replace those that are either dissatisfied or not interested. People have to line up their wants and possibles. I have gotten to a point in my life where good health is of the most important things I want. Lifespans are not infinite, it varies from person to person. There is a birth and a death. For the time being, death occurs somewhere after the age of seventy-five. There are so many people lately that because of proper care have been living into their late eighties and even higher. In my younger years Florida was not a destination for me. What would any one expect from any travel that is done with their parents?  Boredom.  What did happen in my travels was for me to learn different languages, to be able to communicate with the beautiful ladies of the world.

As I grow older and near the next stage of enlightenment in my life, it is time to think of what i like provided my health is good.  The children are in their own stage of growth and are busy moving along at their pace and are less and less involved in what I am doing.  This freedom is allowing me to do whatever is necessary to enjoy life the way I have been dreaming.  Time be in Bermuda shorts everyday and sandals on the beach  running a bar serving my delectable cocktails to the beauties of the world and being the proverbial Socrates of the beach.  Giving and receiving advice on various themes is my most favorite thing to do.  Imagine coin this in a bar on the the sandy beach anywhere in the world.  I would never age mentally, constantly surrounded by fresh minds ready to listen.

Take it easy....

Be cool, the world is not about you.  Being selfish is very unhealthy for all those involved.  The other day I decided to take a walk along the jogging lane of the Cross-Island Parkway.  This is a warm sunny day so I decide to remove my shirt to exercise and get a tan at the same time.  The stretch of land alone the highway is part of a park, where people go to exercise, meditate and unwind from the aches of daily life.

There is no government policy that states that I have to keep my shirt on while exercising in the park.  One day last week, I am in my own world with my headphones on and my shirt off sweating up a storm.  As the music is playing I hear a voice coming from in front of me, "Hey you! Put your shirt on you look terrible!" I holler back, "Keep your eyes on the road and not me!"

Society is full of problems and everyone carries their share and do not need to carry any extra grief.  If for whatever reason you do not like something in front or around you the park is the best place to be.  Who are you to open your mouth and be confrontational.  We all live equally in society and are entitled to be with in the guidelines that are set by us and our peers. 

I do not hold you down and conversly you should not hold me!!!

Menopause....

Men and women go through stages in life. The difference is that women are mentally unstable thane men are when their life altering process occurs. Men do not change life in the same way women do. Women in general are exponentially more sensitive than men. Men do not change as radically as women.

If you can not beat them....join them.

Many times it is easier just to go along with the flow than to put up a fight.  On the other hand my father comes from a generation that believes you should fight for every little thing.  If we choose to fight for every little thing, we loose time from our life.  In the case where the argument is petty, we move along.  There are many cases where the reason for the fight seems small but in the wide spectrum of life the fight will lead to a larger much more complicated picture.

Bacon wrapped chicken breasts.

Summer is grilling weather.  What is better than sitting by the grill when the sun goes down with a drink in your hand and waiting for the meal to be cooked.  I am not in favor of skin and bones in the chicken that eat and therefore chicken breasts are my choice.
Wrap each breast with thick sliced bacon.Season the chicken with oregano salt , pepper and oregano and drizzle with olive oil.
Grill until meat is Juicy and white inside....

Life

Life is fun.  Yes there are days that we do not like it but most of the time life is fun and exciting would love to enjoy every bit of it.  It is important not to let the bad parts of life, overtake the good parts.

There are so many things that we do in life to make life worth living. We spend quite a bit of time worrying about nonsense instead of being happy with what we have and make the best of it.  We are born, raised and educated and then find a job.  Later people meet each other, with the characteristics they are looking for in a mate and they court for a while.  If the  relationship bonds then bingo someone moves in with the other.  

Later come children and you become a parent.  As a mom or dad you raise the children in the manner you saw others before you doing.  The saying goes as follows:

• Little children-little problems.
• Big children-big problems.

As a baby, a person mostly sleeps. When the baby is awake it needs to be fed, bathed and changed from soiled clothing to clean.  If it needs are tended to, then whining and crying sound will come out of the babies mouth.  The same thing happens to a person when they grow old.  As a person ages, they need to rest and be fed and keep clean just like a baby.  Life is good as long as you "go with the flow".

Life Clock....

The clock of life goes at different speeds for each person.  It also affects every person differently.  People tend to be overly sensitive at certain times different from normal.  Change of life comes to people in different ways and most of them do not even notice it.  

I had to take one of my cars in for service this past Saturday.  Whenever, I go to the car dealer for service to any of my vehicles, the diner next door is my place of choice for breakfast.  I happen to have had my youngest son, with me because he likes the breakfast served at this particular establishment.  We arrived for our 8:30 am service appointment to get one of the family vehicles serviced and inspected for the State.   We dropped the vehicle off and headed for breakfast.  We sit down and give our order to the waitress.  The phone rings and it is the Mrs on the line telling me that she is coming with my other two sons Peter and Elias to have breakfast all together.  I summon the waitress to the table and place the order for the rest of the family that will dine for breakfast.

A little while later our server brings my waffle with bacon and Angelos's, cheeseburger deluxe (french fries cole slaw and lettuce and tomato) arrive.  A few minutes later come my wife and my other to sons(Peter and Elias).   The busboy brings the orders out Elias gets ham, and American chefs omelet and Peter has a pastrami tomato and Swiss cheese omelet.  Stella ordered a feta and tomato omelet.  The whole order is correct except that my wife is served a feta, zucchini and onion omelet.  The kitchen had the orders correct but the busboy picked up the wrong plate.  Well!  This ticked of my wife because she thought that we place a wrong ordered on purpose.  She is allergic zucchini and eggplant, and gets very sick if she even smells the stuff.

She went off on a tangent towards the busboy.  He speaks no English and is not at fault.  My sons and I had to point out that she is out of place for running amok.  This is where the old saying caveat-emptor (buyer beware) come into place.  You the buyer are responsible for what you buy.  If the servers make mistakes then you should make sure that you try to inform them a few times of your requirements.  There is no reason to go bananas people are human will always make mistakes by nature.  Life is too short just enjoy it.